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My Random thoughts

Thursday, September 08, 2005
Pain.....

U gave me such a pain
as all my efforts went in vain
now the sweet memories to me are a bane
as they whip my heart like a cane
n I look thru my window pane
as i miss ur presence on my empty lane.....
Posted by pinkcy at 7:10 PM

Hey pinky...

Its a moving poem, very graphic. But doesnt *if i may take the risk of dispensing advice*, repetition of the same phoneme at every line-end takes away the impact?

And the image too resonates your verse, where do you find such pics...?  

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